To Whom It May Concern,

I’m hoping that after you broke into my car and stole my iPod you went under the settings menu, saw that it’s named “Bryan Gumpy’s iPod”, googled my name, and came upon my blog.

I wanted to let you know that if it was so important for you to have an iPod, you could’ve just asked. To be honest, with Winter weather approaching, I’d much rather have my driver’s side window than my iPod. You know, just for future reference.

Also, I thought I’d make some suggestions for listening since you’re the proud new owner my iPod.

For starters, I would listen to the works of John Piper, John MacArthur, Alistair Begg, Mark Driscoll, Francis Chan, and just about anyone else on there that is going to explain in detail your depravity and need for Jesus.

After that, maybe then you’ll be able to appreciate the Christian tunes. Especially ones like Crooked Deep Down by Derek Webb or Blood Is On My Hands by Todd Agnew.


Your iPod Donor,

Bryan Gumpy

5 Responses to To Whom It May Concern,

  1. Brianne says:

    thats messed up!

    I do like the blog though, nice and sarcastic in a way.

  2. Ashley says:

    Oh no! Whoever has awesome timing though. You can just pay for your wedding and get a new window, and then get a new iPod, right?

  3. Laurie says:

    Listen dude who stole Gumpy’s iPod. I hope you read this. You can’t ever get away with stealing you know. God will hold you accountable for every evil deed you ever committed, including this one. So we’ll pray for you, that you turn from your sins and receive the Savior God has sent into the world, Jesus Christ.

    And Bryan, sorry about your iPod.

  4. Rachel says:

    Geez, what Ashley said.

  5. Auntie Cindy says:

    AMEN. Nicely said!

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